As I sit here I contemplate. I look around and see my belongings packed up in boxes. Small and few, I have discarded most of my material things; those of which served only a function and not a feeding of the soul. I have my objects which I look at and they bring me comfort:, a ring my fiancee’ gave me on our anniversary and a chain from my mother which contains a prayer for her son. Those two objects are the only things not in boxes. The rest – books and various treasures from my childhood are all I took from a home which I lived in for 27 years. I have all my studio equipment packed up as well. I am living without many material objects and I don’t really miss it as much as I thought I would. In fact I have learned, gained insight into me as a person and into my relationships. I am waking up everyday to satisfy and hold onto the emotional bonds which keep happiness, love and devotion at the forefront of my priorities. I am living everyday based on the kind of person I am and the conversations I have.
Physical objects fade. Physical objects rot. They sit on shelves collecting dust. They get locked up to never see the light of day. We hold onto objects more often than we hold onto each other. What good does it serve? We can not hold back time, yet we hold back so many things. We don’t let go and rarely allow ourselves to get swept away in everyday life. I’m not talking about work. I am talking about everyday life; sitting in a room with no tv on, just me and you. Holding each other’s hands and looking at the person appreciating the things about them which you can’t touch. Material objects mean nothing to me anymore. They never did, but I look at them differently now. I appreciate a bed now when I lay in one. I appreciate a table to eat a meal on. I appreciate the simple things which I always took for granted. I am thanking God more everyday, even though I am losing more and more.
“Letting go is hard when you think it’s easy” – rocky bourgoyne
What does that mean? It means when you take something for granted, the day you lose is going to be a hard day for you. The impact of not “having it” is harder when you never appreciated it. But if you thank God everyday for the things you have…when you really appreciate the things in your life, you constantly are aware of how special it is. You appreciate it. So when you have to let it go, it is not the same kind of “hard” because you always knew it wasn’t yours. It was always God’s. It was always going back to dust. Remember, “Dust to dust, ashes to ashes”. You are expecting to lose it one day so you treat it like it’s your last time having it. Yes, it’s still difficult and hard but in a different way. This only applies to “letting go” by choice and not by being forced or something taken from you. That’s a different story. Nevertheless, cherish what you have and the moments you have with it. Cherish the people. We are all here on borrowed time. In a split second, things can come crashing down. It’s happening to me and unfortunetly in a forceful, unnatural way.